Rocky's Editorial: July 9, 2014
Purr? Is this thing on? Hello, humans! Today I will reflect on the past six months, and what's in store for the future! In January of this year, I began my quest to become a feline American hero. I knew it wouldn't be easy. My only hired staff is my well-meaning but visually impaired human servant. I pay him by sitting on his lap. He appreciates that I am cute and cuddly. Thanks to a free website company called Wix, the human could build my website to the best of his ability.
Building the website was the easy part. The human had to get used to Facebook and Twitter to spread my message, as well as understand the messages of others. There are so many people out there that I wish to reach, because I believe in what I say. The human has taken the time to read a lot of news articles. This is necessary so I can properly discuss my stance on the various issues plaguing our great country. He can enlarge the print on the computer screen, but I can tell it's exhausting for him. My sister and I bug him a lot so he won't stare at the monitor too long. I especially bother him when he's making those political cat meme pictures located in the Presidential Platform section. I have partially outlined my Presidential Platform, and will continue to add to it. Marriage was the most recent addition, with GMO's and immigration soon to follow.
I had set three goals for the human, to be accomplished by the end of June. He accomplished them all. He created my first T-shirt in April. I recently got my own domain name, rocky2016.net. Good domain names are important! Last but not least, he uploaded my first political campaign ad on Youtube! =^..^= There is so much more that I wish to do! My plans right now are to figure out the best way to spread the word, as well as create Rocky merchandise! I could imagine righteously angry Americans in every city wearing a Rocky 2016 T-shirt! I also have some great ideas for bumper stickers! For now, buying the domain name as well as buying us a really awesome cat tree (Thank you, human!) has left him flat broke once again. The T-shirts might have to wait. My promise to my readers is that the human will give this all he has. Maybe one day, he'll have more people to help him. Until then, he's running on faith alone. I sincerely want to thank each and every one of you who has given my website a "like" on Facebook. Please spread the word! In order to right this American ship, we need all paws on deck! With Love, Rocky